Paying Full Price for Plastic Surgery is SO Yesterday

I know what you are thinking. You have ALWAYS wanted that tummy tuck/ face lift/ boob job/ lip enhancement/ liposuction. But those high prices have really got you down. Well, it looks like the cure for your plastic surgery blues is here. Just head on down to South America, where you will find plenty of doctors and low, low, low prices on your plastic surgery needs.

A face lift that might cost $15,000 in the United States costs roughly $5,000 in Argentina, or a combination breast implant and liposuction combination might cost $3,700.

BOOYA! I am on the first flight down to Argentina. $5000 is SO much more reasonable than $15k for that face lift I have been wanting since my 15th birthday. So that could just be an added bonus to the trip. And, what could go wrong by having the surgery in South America?

Critics say offers that look too good to be true probably are, as 34-year-old D. Anderson -- who did not want her full first name published -- found when a botched breast lift and tummy tuck led to a nine-day hospital stay upon her return home to Texas.

Anderson said she got a life-threatening infection and had to return three times to Argentina for corrections on her surgery, but problems persist.

"I ended up with a hematoma in my left breast, which is hard as a rock. My right nipple is the size of a silver dollar and my left nipple is the size of a quarter," she said. "I had nice boobs to begin with. So I went from nice boobs to uneven, crazy boobs."

Pfft. So you have crazy boobs. Who cares? Stop crying about it. I am sure that they are much better now than your natural, small boobs. Different size nipples is totally normal, too.

I can't wait for my Surgery-Tourism trip down South! I am trying to get a group together so we can see the sights of South America, as well as improve our appearance. And for all of you ladies out there,

In Colombia, 40 new clinics have opened up to serve tens of thousands of foreigners a year, many of them in Cali, a city where drug gangsters notoriously seek girlfriends who have had plastic surgery.

So that could just be an added bonus to the trip. Come home with a cheap boob job (that may or may not be safe) AND a drug gangster boyfriend. That, my friends, is the definition of win-win.